Wednesday, October 14, 2009

CA Dreamin'

After a brief business trip south of the border, I headed to CA for a long weekend to visit the fam and to see my nieces and nephews in action.  After a fun-filled weekend, my oldest brother took me to see his orthopaedic surgeon on Monday morning to get a second opinion regarding my ankle. After about 45 minutes of an onslaught of questions and a close examination of my MRI, Dr. Legome said very simply, "you have a lot of problems my dear, and I am sure you already know that." He continued by confirming everything I've been told, including the diagnosis of CMT and telling me that not only should I have the surgery, but that the quality of my life entirely depends on it. He then spent the next 15 minutes lecturing me on losing weight . . . as if I didn't already know that was an issue!

I completely lost it then and there; I finally let all the fear, anxiety, and anger release from inside. . . I think I was still hanging onto a small sliver of hope or a medical miracle when Dr. Legome validated everything that I have been wanting to avoid. And, now that the right foot is hurting also, we asked if I should take the plunge and have both feet operated on at the same time. He thinks it would be far too traumatic for my body, so I have to make plans for how to address that foot sometime in the future. Thank goodness I had my big brother there to put his arm around me; I don't think I could have handled another doctor's appointment by myself.

I managed to board the plane Monday night with dry eyes. . . I joked to myself that I think I am finally moving past denial and straight into anger! I'm progressing . . . definitely progressing! That's good, right?